A mid renewal

Today went by slow, i woke up, ate breakfast got ready for church and left. Not much of a sunday morning, but on the car ride over i had so much in my head, even while playing DS with my little brother. I don't think it's ever too late to change, or to make something happen for yourself. All that is required is a little bit of motivation and dedication, a little of that can go a long way. And on the car ride, i went over my life, through all those thoughts time seemed to slow down, i remembered my childhood, how i had barely any friends, how i would play by myself in the park, and every now and then someone would come by to join me. I remembered that insane babysitter, the neighborhood i used to live in, the school i used to attend. I remembered how shy i was and how good in school i was in elementary schools. I remembered my crush during 6th grade, and the fact that i was patrol captain even though no one new me. The life i lived in the past i could not change because i was small and i didn't know how life worked yet. I didnt know about the truths and lives that go on. I couldn't do much but live my life carelessly. I remembered my times in middle school. I remembered how small i was, how new the school was to me, and how new the people were. I guess during those years i silently learned about the world more often. I learned that drama existed, that he likes/she likes goes around everywhere, and that i was actually growing even if it was a little. I remember meeting one close friend that probably changed my life. I recall the style i was wearing, Vans shoes, ecko jeans, and loose shirts. Rather funny looking back. I remember that slowly but surely i was beginning to make friends. And from that one person i made friends with, a whole tree of friends became abundant. I met the people that i go to high school with today on that year. I became more outgoing because of them, i became less frightened of what people were like. And i definitely had more fun in 8th grade then i did in 7th.

I remember how routine my summers were, the occasional friend visits, my family vacations to the beach, water parks and such.

And when high school started, that's when life had a huge new door opened. Sadly i remembered how lazy i had gotten, being jealous of everyone elses smartness, i was squalid with my work. My freshman year was pathetic. Even though i became morre outgoing with more friend, i still did little in school and that cost me dearly today. Sophomore year was also my squalid year, i look back and wish that i did work harder in school,seeing how challenging it is to get up when you've fallen so much, but i'm up for the challenge, it was the year where i figured what kind of girls i was into, the years where drama involved me as well, and the year where hobbies entered my life. I remembered my junior year and all that it offered. I remember meeting new people and starting a new. I was regaining my efforts in school, and my fitness. I met someone and we had it going for while, but on that same year i learned of pain, pain that cuts deeper then any knife, a type of pain that's crushes like a hundred boulders. Betrayal and lies, all that happened, but i also learned of an amazing feeling called courage and understanding, i met a hero who in time became the best thing in my life. From my crushed state, she picked me up with both hands willing to help me tackle my challenges head on, with her help i got up and dusted my self off. I learned that in life there are many surprises to be in store. And that one of those surprises can be just what you've been looking for your entire life. And for once, my summer wasn't routine, my summer was exciting, i learned of a relationship unlike any other. A special kind, where you just know no matter how far, or how distant the other is, you'll always feel like im right next to you. During the summer i experienced such an amazing feeling, under the bright colorful lights, i saw her face glowing in the night. I was standing next to the girl i was certain i would one day live in a house with, on that day it was certain, this one special girl, hero, savior, motivation, the person who made me a stronger person myself, that i love her.

I look back to all those times and in the car i looked out and i got a sense of inspiration, it's not too late to work even harder. That's why i want to shape up myself, embrace my hobbies and talents, and llive more healthy.

I know that life is full of surprises and cliff to climb, but i know that we'll get past all that, and we will smile one day in the future to each other, while we sit on our couch watching a movie.

I feel inspired to do.


P.s. I miss chauzy



p.p.s I love Chau :D